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1984

Chooklotto gives birth in Real Life on Hey Hey

The second episode of ’84 exploits frozen chooks and goes more regional, while riding the popularity of the band ‘Real Life’.

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Surviving its first ever late night broadcast the week before after a leap from early morning, Daryl Somers, Ossie Ostrich and the gang are looking forward to more shenanigans.

Episode 02 – February 18, 1984.

After the zany introduction of a ‘stranger’ randomly exploding to help promote moving to a new time slot in the first episode, episode two gets a new opening title which will hold fort for a while.

Already, a quick thank-you from Daryl and Ossie to you, the viewer, as well as their studio audience (cut to empty chairs) and you can tell we’re in for a treat.

Within moments, voiceover extraordinaire John Blackman trials out a new character voice, sounding very Graham Kennedy Cyril-esque, laying down the inside production jokes. The broadcast range for Hey Hey had been narrowed to the metro markets of Melbourne and Sydney for years as an early morning children’s show, but now that they have been moved to night-time, the audience has expanded to more regional stations of Australia. Daryl acknowledges the new audience by reading out messages they received after viewing the first show of 1984 for the first time, and throwing again to Blackman with some already established characters like The Man Who Has Had Too Much To Drink and the mannequin head that is Dickie Knee. Even Daryl breaks the golden rule of showing how Dickie is created – by cutting down to below the desk, with Props Assistant Ian “Krystal” Murray doing his thang.

Ian "Krystal" Murray and Dickie Knee.
One of many spoiler alerts.

After a time call, Daryl acknowledges the regional stations during in (who are running 5 minutes late, for some reason), so the intro is played again, in which Jacki MacDonald walks out with her latest wacky item to promote. This week: A Pet Mosquito bird house. Bzz Bzzzz.

Time for a musical performance by Real Life who are the hottest thing in the music charts right now, with their song Catch Me I’m Falling. Released in late 1983, the track peaked in the Kent Music Report at Number 8 in 1984, lasting 27 weeks.

After a commercial break, it’s time for Media Watch Press, which ends up being a ribbing towards Blackman after Daryl and Ossie show a ‘party photo’ of Blackman the weekend before encouraging the audience to send in reasonable photos of their Hey Hey parties. This is in the day of camera film and polaroids, so if you mailed your photos in after the show, you will probably see them in a week or two on TV. Because of so much time wasted discussing the party and the photos, they throw to an ad break, only for Countdown’s Molly Meldrum pop up on camera. Even though he’s ABC contracted, apparently he’s ‘okay’ to make a brief appearance on the show. Daryl probes him on the recent wedding of Elton John, but not getting much out of him.

“G’day, it’s John Blackman here from Telecom Mobilenet…”

Molly then throws to another live performance, Bluestone with their song The Same Party. Unfortunately there is very little information on this band and song on the internet, other than that they were around throughout the 70s, but dropped off the radar after The Same Party. So here’s some evidence they were around.

One ad break later, we finally get the segment of Chooklotto that is legally playable! After the initial setup in the first episode back for 1984, people mailed in their entries by the truckload. Daryl enlisted the help of Sir Eric Pearce – a pioneer in TV and radio broadcasting – to help sort the 10,000 entries down to 700.

Sir Eric is on the right, of course. I think…

In order to show off the newly designed Chooklotto wheel, Molly stays around to approve it, while Jacki catches the frozen chooks popping out the hole as Daryl attempts to spin the metal sphere. For the viewers playing at home, the winning numbers:

  • 13, 11, 19, 16. Congratulations C Bekker of Stockton, NSW. You won a week-long trip to Great Keppel Island.

Ad break time, and we’re back to Media Watch, but time it’s all about TV. You’ll have to click through to YouTube to watch the video attached, but here’s a quick run-through:

  • Jokes flow left and right over a TV commercial with a cat being on a roof not getting wet while it’s raining.
  • Rival network Channel 7 point out that Channel 9 has an error in their talent promo with Bert Newton putting on a golf course.

Back to a commercial break, and after a ribbing towards house band player Wilbur Wilde and his sax playing, a studio performance by Stephen Cummings is on the cards, singing Backstabbers.

Time for Consumer Watch with Tony Porter, who uses this time to breakdown everyday items and asks the question: Why?
However, I get generally confused with the products he ‘exposes’ as a little questionable – because it’s just flawed designing.

  • Eta brand BBQ sauce bottle – 1/4 of the sauce remains at the base of the bottle
  • Weeties box – how can you reseal a cereal packet
  • False advertising – Cork floor tiles say $6.99 for a packet of 9 tiles, when normal price is $4.99
  • Cask bottle opener – broken because its cheaply made

Meh. Ad break.

Sauce and cereal. Cereal and sauce.

A quick live performance by the vibrant Hoodoo Gurus performing My Girl, and Daryl promotes they are doing a Sydney show on March 17, so if you want to be part of the audience, write / call in.

After a short break, it’s time for the Wheel segment, with the following prizes:

  • Pulsar GL Back Sedan $9100 on the road
  • Sitmar’s South Pacific cruise
  • Royal Doulton – 36 piece canton design
  • Doug Thorley Viscount Pop-up caravan
  • Hitachi fridge

Home viewer Annette Price from Gladstone spins the wheel and wins a Holliday for 2 at Wrest Point Hotel Casino. The Producer is in good spirits and for some reason, throws in a VCR for good measure.

After an ad break, we’ve hit What Cheezuz Me Off. On the panel, is Wendy Stapleton and Brian Cadd who just sit back and let the segment flow. The chats drag on for so long, Cheezuz lasts two breaks. The hard hitting topics include:

  • When you buy jam donuts at the supermarket and there’s no jam inside
  • Hey Hey It’s Saturday is up for a Logie, but it’s under the childrens category due to its previous existence. The camera crew walk out as they don’t get to go to the awards night
  • Travelling on the freeway and the truck drivers look down into your car from their cabin (essentially having a perv)
  • New person in the country struggles with the English language. Red Symons poses as a foreigner in public ‘Candid Camera’ style

Such a thrilling segment.

Wendie and Bryan

One commercial break later, and it’s time for Gavin Wood’s Pop Report. In this week’s news:

  • Michael Jackson’s up for Grammy nominations, and Gavin shows off the picture disc of Thriller
  • Shakin’ Stevens and Bonnie Tyler duet coming out – Rockin’ Good Way
  • Flashdance the movie has grossed $90 million in the U.S.
  • Star Trek – The Search For Spock coming out over christmas
  • Rita Coolidge and Emmy-Lou Harris in town for a promo tour
  • Elton John in the country next week with Mondo Rock as support
  • Sandy and The Sunsets leaving the country
  • Preview: Eurogliders – Another Day In The Big World
  • Spectrum reform to perform in Adelaide
Gavin Wood – you’ll bar up!
  • Singles Review: Vanessa Venning – Midnight Blue, Jo Jo Zep – The Shape I’m In, Sunnyboys – Love In A Box
  • Preview: Paul YoungLove For The Common People
  • The Bengal Tigers sign a new international deal
  • Album Review: The Honeymoon – Promise, Hoodoo Gurus – Self titled, Willie Nelson – Without A Song
  • The Four Topps and The Temptations on tour
  • Renee Geyer touring
  • Broken-up Bands: The Reels, Altered Images
  • Check the Billboard Magazine charts as Real Life – Send Me An Angel reaches Number 29 in the U.S.

Speaking of which – this is then followed by a performance / music clip combo of Real Life performing said song, leading into a commercial break.

Time for the segment Pick Your Object – where a home viewer is selected from the entry barrel, and the celebrity guest (in this case, Wendy Stapleton again) has to guess what the zoomed-in object is. Every time there is an incorrect guess, a prize is taken away from the hamper. In this case, Henry Follington lost out on scoring a Super Mastermind board game and a pair of sunglasses due to Wendy’s failed attempts. But he did win a Trivial Pursuit board game, luggage, The Mining Game board game, and Kodak film. (These prizes are slightly repetitive!)

I’ll give you a sneak-y suspicion on what it is.

After the final ad break, it’s time to wrap things up. The house band plays out over the closing credits, with Red Symons making a cameo appearance. This was before he became a regular cast member – just keep that in mind. They all jam to a 4 bar blues medley of Tequila, See You Later Alligator, Hello Josephine and Your Mama Don’t Dance with Brian Cadd on piano, and Daryl on vocals.

At a running time of 2 hours, they at least shaved off 8 minutes from last week. But it’s still loose and unpredictable. They certainly nourish the musical talent.

Main cast:

Daryl Somers, Ossie Ostrich, Jacki “Bucketmouth” MacDonald, Sound-over Murray Tregonning, Voice-over John Blackman, Words-over David Ross, All-over Gavin Wood, Krystal and his magic box, Tout and his magic buttons, Wilbur and his magic band, Sir Puffy and his magic horn, Phil and his magic finger.

Viewed on HeyHey.TV via paid subscription.

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